gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
