why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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