He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
