idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
