You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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