Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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