I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
