Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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