Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
