Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
