I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
