Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
