I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
