I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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