We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Randomize
