i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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