Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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