its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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