Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
