Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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