On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
It's blow job season.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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