I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Actions speak louder than pants.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize