Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
