btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
