He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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