HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize