Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
