bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
