He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
