I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Randomize
