I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize