He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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