11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Duck Duck Cougar?
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize