If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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