I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
