would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Everything about him screamed your future.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
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