remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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