dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
