If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
