In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
