Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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