he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
