we have officially lost it.
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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