Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
