just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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