these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
