He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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