Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
