I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
why do cheetos always look like penises
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
My dick has a subreddit
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
