found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize